Did you scream?
I can’t! no! I won’t forget, that night, the cold, salty sea-like breeze. The taste of blood between my teeth, I remember it all to well and I ponder from time to time, asking myself. Why? I’ve lived a good life, I never stepped on anyone’s toes, I never did anything wrong. Then why am I here? was I not good enough for her? Did I wrong her somehow or someway? Maybe, I don’t know. I can’t bear to come to grief with it, or even the idea that I may have played some part in this sick sinister plot. A plot that I, conceived from the twisted concaves of my diluted mind, which I dare not speak apron. I remember it as being asked, “Did you scream”? As if some sick prick was getting aroused off the concept of it all. It was foggy that night as the gray white filled snow cover the ground. My hand had grown white with fear as she tried to console me, Comfort me. She kept telling me “It not your fault”. Hmm, I beg to differ, for no one knew what was afoot. I swear it felt all like a dream, the dark greys and the harsh whites, the violet reds. Was I honestly lead to believe that this was right? No, no. I’m not stupid or crazy but I must be, as I lay down on this cold marble table with a single blaring white light swinging overhead, while the doctors speak in codes and riddles, to insure I will unwillingly go along with more test.
Now I know you are wondering, what I did that was so twisted for me to be sent away? However, in reality, I don’t know, or I don’t quite remember. It all started back in o-six; I meet this young lady, or more like viewed, whom I was just infatuated with at first sight. Her tender soft to the touch skin, her model like figure, and those big blue eyes that drowned me: I had to have her. No, I had to get her. A few days passed by and I would see her, as I walked thought the busy streets of Manhattan. She was always behind me or towards the side never in front. Whenever I would turn she turned, as if she was stalking me, or maybe avoiding me, I don’t know. I had to talk to her. I felt as if I had meet her before, but when. This pattern went on for months; I would see her everywhere, each day more and more to no end, always watching her over my shoulder, never speaking to her. Then one day it happen. It was raining out and the road seemed to be empty, everyone with sense had found shelter but no not me, I just had to go out during the storm, my reasoning behind it I can’t recall. When all of a sudden a flash of light blinded my field of view I swerved left crashing into a nearby light post, the impact knocking me unconscious, when I awoke, I was in shock. I couldn’t believe it, of all the things in the world, why tonight. After I had calmed down, I emerged from the car to see who or what I had hit, and to my surprise, I hit someone. Why were they even out this night? Why! After my outburst, I noticed something it was her. The lady who was my mystery, the lady I was dying to meet was dead, I mean, sure it wasn’t my fault but, still I killed someone I couldn’t believe it. I slide down my car door in disbelief and I was right to for that was merely a dream, or at least I believe so for within seconds later I awoke in my bed. Things were different from that night thought. It seemed everywhere I turned right in the comer of my eye there, she was or at least her mangled body was. Always behind me just out of sight always taunting me, as I turned she kept moving just out of sight. It wasn’t just in the streets ether. Oh no my house, my job everywhere. For the next two and half years, I had these nightmares and sighting of this lady, who I killed in a dream; I must have been going crazy. The concept drove me insane, time after time, night after night, I killed her. A constant reminder in the back of my head, of something I couldn’t have done. Every dream made it worst her unfamiliar yet blood-kin voice echoed in my head “did you scream”. I would always ask why she was doing this, and she never replied. I started taking pills for sleep, I even went weeks without sleep so the dreams would stop, but every time I shut my eyes the same question. However, one night I got an answer.
I awoke at 3:02, my hands were a blood red, and my sheets were dripping in blood. I jumped from bed, but fell onto the floor with a knife in my hand. The hell, I was dreaming, yet killing myself. My vison at this point was very foggy, as I stumbled through the halls. All I could hear was her voice over and over “did you scream”? To no avail, I looked toward the window asking myself “would I”. I almost jumped when. the cold, salty sea-like breeze and the taste of blood between my teeth made it all came back to me I pushed her, no, I stabbed her, no I murdered them. A sick smile rose across my face as the banging at my door grew louder and louder. I never noticed any of the knocking until now, yet I knew it was the police. They took me away that night, sent me into this hellhole of a hospital. Now I’m sorry please do forgive me but the doctor is back, yes, the blue eyed lady with the perfect skin and figure. She is questioning me again and considering letting me out again, and I will try, to live again, to please her.