Hello fucking fellow readers, I like to suck my dick

  • I am a fellow fan of gaming. I’m also a fan of creepypastas, and so, because of a recent event I thought would never happen in real life, I will share one story about a certain video game titled Rayman Legends. The game is the newest installment in the already amazing Rayman series, before came Rayman Origins, which I also played.

It happened near December. I had got my hands on a new game for my brothers Xbox 360, the game was called Rayman Origins, a game in which I wanted to play for a long time. When I played it, I immediately fell in love with the characters and series. It’s vibrant colors and wonderful level design was enough to make me squeal. But unfortunately, it didn’t last. As much as I begged him not to, my brother had to sell his custom paint Xbox 360 and all the games with it in, including Rayman Origins, in order to afford the games for the new Xbox One. Naturally, I was saddened by this. But he promised he would buy me the next installment in the Rayman series, which is Rayman Legends. I was thrilled. “I get to play Rayman Legends! Heck Yeah!” I thought.

November came around, and I was already beginning High School. When I got home, my brother said to check his games and apps on the Xbox One. I went ahead and did, I was shocked with what I saw. There on the screen was a downloaded copy of Rayman Legends. I was filled to the brim with happiness, thus making my day. After days upon days of playing the game, fighting toads and beating the bosses, I began to notice something. Turns out I had these things called Lucky Tickets. I scratched one and unlocked something, a Back to Origins painting. My mind lit up, “I get to play previous levels of Rayman Origins!? Awsome!". I NEEDED to get all of these paintings! I simply want to relive my days playing Origins. It wasn’t long until I had to go to bed.

December was here again, I was happy and cheerful, as winter was my favorite season. But that also meant Christmas was coming, a time to spend with family and being happy. When that eventually happened, I got a gift from my brother. It was a copy of both Castle Crashers Remastered, and Plants vs Zombies Garden Warfare . I simply could not believe my eyes. I thanked him and immediately booted up the games. I played for a while, until I remembered I had Rayman Legends to play as well. I was already close to 100% completion, and so that kept me going when I was facing the Momma of all Nightmares. When I finally beated her, I got some Lucky Tickets. Two were 10,000 lums, One was a Creature, another a Teensie, and finally a Back to Origins painting… But that was odd, by this point in the game, I had already acquired all Back to Origins paintings. So then why did I unlock another? I went to look at it, and the painting said, “The darkest of them all”. Odd title aside, I was wondering who this was referring to, could it be the Dark Teensies? I had no idea, and so, I checked the painting. It didn’t have a preview of the level like all paintings do. Instead, the painting was black and had two yellow glowing eyes. They seemed to be glaring at me. Out of curiosity, I tried playing the level. “No.. You’re not the one I seek”. What? Ok… I realized I was playing as Glombrox. I tried entering as other characters. None of them worked, except for one. The original Rayman.

I tried entering the painting, this time, it allowed me to enter. I was a bit creeped out by this point. It then loaded up an Invasion Level. This one was of Dark Rayman, so naturally, I was going to have a difficult time beating this level. I always hated playing Invasion levels that have Dark Rayman in them. The level was about to begin when I noticed, there weren’t any Teensies to save. Still the level continued like normal. I eventually beat it, and it threw me into the Heroes Gallery. Ok.. so what was the point of that? I tried re entering the painting, but it wouldn’t allow me, It would just give me a message saying “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?”. I tried again, this time the message was “What? Do you enjoy pain you sick weirdo?”. What the hell was this game saying to me? I shut the Xbox off sighing and shaking my head thinking “Great.. Now it’s broken”. I didn't touch the game for three months.

Spring Break was here, now I have all the time to relax. I played my PS3 for a while playing Kingdom Hearts 2.5 hd remix. I got bored and decided to boot up Rayman Legends on the Xbox One. I tried continuing my save file to get some Teensies, but to my surprise, the Save file was gone. The only options were New Game, and Uplay. Frustrated, I hit new game, oh well, least I get to relive it all. But the utter annoyance that I had to regain all my progress was such a drag. I had to once again earn every creature and everything. It was an annoying task to do. I finally managed to beat the last level of Back to Origins again. Opened my Lucky Tickets and found… another Back to Origins painting. Was this game joking with me? Of course the painting was the same painting I unlocked previously. This time however with a different title. “He seeks HIM, the optimistic one”. Ok..? What does that even mean? I tried entering with the current character I was using, Ray Vass, and once again. I couldn’t enter. I tried entering as Rayman, surprisingly, it didn’t allow Rayman in either. A message simply appeared saying “He’s had enough misery..”. I tried entering as Globox. Surprisingly, it allowed me in, I once again had to beat an Invasion level with no Teensies to save. This was starting to look familiar.

But once the level ended, the painting was gone. I checked to see if anything changed, certainly enough things did change.

The main gallery was now Darker, and there didn’t seem to be any light source of any kind. Polokus, the sloth and bubble blower was nowhere to be seen. Every world was now locked and the creatures I unlocked were now gone as well. However there was only two paintings available. One said “It’s t-o l-te..- .them”  I couldn’t quite make out what it said. The other lead to the Heroes Gallery. I entered the Heroes Gallery first, only to find...Nothing… All the heroes I unlocked were gone, as well as the princesses. The Grand Minimus, and the Goth Teensie were gone too. Even Rayman was gone. There was only one character left in the Heroes Gallery, Raymesis. I picked him and Globox simply vanished. A screech was heard as Globox yelled in pain, like whenever he usually gets hurt in game. My screen went black, then I saw Raymesis in a level that appeared to be an Invasion level. It was a Dark Rayman Invasion level in the world Olympus Maximus. I managed to beat it in one try. The level was soon over, but something was off. Raymesis looked scared, which I knew was off. It then flung me into a cutscene. It pictured Dark Rayman attempting to chase down Raymesis. His yellow glowing eyes were now bloodshot, they looked murderous. Raymesis was running for his life, until he hit a dead end. Dark Rayman then punched Raymesis, over and over, trails of blood were coming down his nose and mouth. He ended up inflating like a balloon and popped. Ending his life. Dark Rayman gave off a piercing smile, showing his stained yellow teeth. His eyes staring right into me, as if it was peircing my soul. His clothing couldn't be even more messier then it already was. It was gruesome to a point where I shut the Xbox One off immediately.

What the hell did I just witness? What did I even play? All these questions were circulating to my head when I thought of one thing. What if all those gone heroes were killed by Dark Rayman? I felt my head pound. I desperately needed a break. A few hours later I booted the game up one last time to see… That the save file was deleted. But this time, I didn’t dare press new game.

I asked my brother if he could delete the game for good. But he asked “Why? I thought you liked this game. What’s wrong with it?”. I told him everything I witnessed, but he shrugged it off and said “You were probably just seeing things little bro”. Was I? I told him to replay the game and see what happens. He had the same occurrence as me. But the Painting said “This is Your fault”, and it wasn’t accessible. No character could get in, the game would simply say “Do you want them to die again?” or “It’s already too late for them”. My brother said “Damn, here bud, i’ll delete the game and download PVZ GW2 for you, how does that sound?”. I told him that would do the job perfectly. Still didn’t help the nightmares I had. Two months after that whole encounter with Legends, I felt like I wanted to play some Plant vs Zombies GW to take my mind off things. But the copy wasn’t there. It was replaced by Rayman Legends. I was shaking, how the hell did this come back? I managed to encourage myself enough to play the game. This time the game didn’t have that extra painting. Thank god. I turned the Xbox off one last time. I went to my chromebook to whisk my cares away. I checked my emails for anything important, I then noticed I had received a message from Ubisoft. Wait what? I never contacted them. They apologized for me encountering a dark prototype of Rayman Legends, they stated

Hello there Mr ----------

We apologize for you having a copy of our Prototype of a Rayman project. It was supposed to be an expansion pack for Halloween, but we felt it was far too dark and scrapped the idea all together. However only one copy of the prototype was launched as a downloadable. Unfortunately the prototype also had many bugs and glitches in it, and those bugs went on to your copy of PVZ GW. We asked Microsoft to remove that one copy and replace it with another one of Rayman Legends. It’s rather sad but you won’t be able to play PVZ GW ever again without it corrupting.

I was heartbroken, I could no longer play one of my favorite games of all time. But I had to move on eventually. I decided to finish Rayman Legends one last time. My headache couldn’t possibly be any worse. I was about to unlock a new character, which is the only thing that lifted up my spirits. I got enough lums and opened up my menu to see.

New Hero Unlocked! The Darkest of them all!